Consoling a Friend That is Dealing with Grief
When a friend or a loved one is going through grief of some kind, it can be in our natural instincts to try and help or console that person in any way we can. And that’s a good thing! But at the same time, it is important to recognize that everyone deals with grief differently, and it is important to respect that. The best thing you can do is to make sure that the other person knows that you are available to help them in whatever way they may need during their time of grief.
Some people prefer to spend time in the company of others during their time of grief. Some may prefer to spend more time alone, in order to “re-charge” themselves during such a time. Neither way is better than the other. Some ways just work better for different people. If the person that is dealing with grief prefers to spend some time alone, then it is important to give them that space. The small gesture of letting them know that you are there for them in any way you can be, along with the respect for their space will be deeply appreciated.
It can be easy to get caught up in how helping someone else can make us feel. And if it’s someone that you care about, it can be an especially great feeling. But what’s most important during this time is the needs of the person that you are trying to help. If the person you are trying to console prefers to have more alone time, try not to be offended by that. That’s just the way that that particular person is dealing with the situation. But even if that person might prefer to spend time alone, it doesn’t hurt to check up on them every once in a while. After some time, they may feel ready to spend time with others again, and you just might be the first person that they call. If the person is someone who prefers to be in your company during their time of grief, then that might make things a little bit easier. Spend time with that person and continue to be there for them in whatever way you can.
The key to consoling a friend/loved one that is going through a tough time can be summed up by emotional availability and respect for the other person’s way of grieving. Grief often comes as a result of a change in a person’s life that forces them to adjust to their life in different ways, such as after the loss of a loved one. During that time, that person may be infinitely grateful knowing that they have someone who is willing to console them in their close corner, even if they don’t necessarily show it right away. Be the best friend you can be by showing that person the love and respect that that person needs during their difficult time.
